My inner super hero is the OLD Hulk. Not the regular Hulk when he’s old, but his curmudgeonly grandfather.

Most people morph into their parents as they age… not me. I skipped a whole generation and am turning into my crabby (but lovable) grandfather.

I’m reading a book where the main character lives in the same apartment as Claude Debussy in 1891- she actually lives directly above him and her brother, who is friends with Claude, told her that La damoiselle élue is written about her (she looks like a Rossetti (founder of the Pre-Raphaelite movement) painting). ANYWAYS. This sounds super-familiar… but I can’t think of what the song actually sounds like. I look it up on my music service, but it’s not pulling up any suggestions. I finally found it just a little bit ago and started playing it.

The title is familiar, but the song is not at all.

It’s actually really annoying.

Holy crap, I’m turning into a crotchety old man!


Okay, I’m not sure if the song as it is written is annoying (chords) or if the singer is just horrible or what. The singer is horrible. She sounds like when I had to find wedding music to sing and could only find what we refer to as “little old church ladies” (not an actual insult- just used to describe) singing bad opera-style.

I have noticed lately, in the last several months or so, getting that nails-on-a-chalkboard feeling from certain songs that have strange chords- mostly “modern” classical… and I do start getting impatient with the music after a short while and have to hurry up and change the song because I am inexplicably on the verge of anger and annoyance. I find myself shorter-tempered while listening to certain songs, even if I normally like that song (any type of  music). Sometimes I just feel like “I don’t have time for this shit” when listening to new songs that I’ve never heard before if I’m not instantly grooving.

I don’t know if my lack of audio-tolerance is from getting older or just crankier or maybe even from spending so many years at karaoke, being forced to listen to awful song choices or singers…


I did find a better version of La damoiselle élue that is performed by Victoria de los Angeles, who is actually a very talented singer whom I enjoy. She is on several tracks of one of my favorite opera CD’s. I think with that version before, it was a combination of bad singing and some wonky chords. I stuck it out thru this one, even though I was starting to feel the rage creeping in once that 13:51 mark hit with the wonky chords. Not sure if it was worth it. It only got vaguely better after another minute or so.

Meh. Deleted from playlist.



Side note: if you don’t know who Claude Debussy is, fucking go read a book. Google that shit. You’re really missing out on life. He wrote Clair de Lune, which is a totally gorgeous piano piece. Also, Google “Pre-Raphaelite” if you don’t know what that is either. It’s one of my favorite styles of painting.

I really worry about people in this day and age. Probably because I’m a crotchety old man at heart.


Songs that give me good chills

The 1 perk about having depression/anxiety disorder: it allows you to feel art/music/movies/books way more passionately. These are some of the songs that move me.

Ludwig Von Beethoven: Piano Trio No. 4 “Ghost”

Muse: Take a Bow

Weezer: Only in Dreams (the instrumental 2nd half of the  song)

Lila Downs: Paloma Negra and Burn it Blue (with Caetano Veloso)

Sergei Rachmaninoff: Piano Concertos-  No. 2 and No. 3 (videos coming soon… there’s a lot to choose from on YouTube and both concertos are huge with multiple parts)

Also- I will post more as I think of them.